Look at your past but don’t dwell on it, look at it and remember the feeling that transformed you as a reminder to not repeat the lesson you have learned thru your pain, look at it enough to remind you how far you come and how much more you will move forward.
Sometimes glimpses of the horrible pain come up as a reminder to never go back. My mind has been wanting me to fall back in the illusion of me questioning my self-worth, my value as a woman and my inner beauty.
I come a long way and still have much more to go, but the last few weeks have been wanting me to look back at my scars that were left behind as a result of the divorce. The tremendous pain and belief that I wasn’t good enough did a number on my self-esteem. It resurfaced! Having me questioned my BEING.
Sometimes certain situations and encounter come about as a reminder that we MUST not define our self-worth and get lost in others. No, this will not happen again. That was the lesson of my marriage, I completely lost myself to the point of major depression.
Slipping into a shadow period is no fun, but this time around I have been fully aware of my patterns and giving myself space to go thru my growth period. It is very humbling to feel like SHIT as it always brings me back to what is most important in my life. My boys, friends, and family and ME.
It FORCES me to quiet my mind, and slow downs my body to let the intense energy to flow thru me, to hear its wisdom. I am trying not to resist it and allowing myself to feel it. I buckled up and go straight to my tools (the upcoming blog about tools for going thru a growth period). It never fails beautiful wisdom and yet another layer peels.
I feel I have not fully healed from the beliefs that came as a result of being "left" and I know that I am on a steady road to knowing that I am worth it, that one day I will find love again, that I will be CHOSEN and SEEN for who I really am.
In the meanwhile, I will refocus on my passion for life, my boys, and taking care of mind, body and soul. Remembering my true nature, remembering who I am. A GODDESS.
Much Love,
The Mommy Goddess